The Leadership Trap That Looks Like Success (But Isn’t)

I often see managers caught in a strange cycle.

They’re the ones everyone runs to when something goes wrong.
Smart. Decisive. Dependable. The kind of people who make things happen.

And for a while, that reputation feels like success.

But then the pattern shifts.
Their days start filling with other people’s fires.
They spend more time reacting than leading.
And they start to wonder why their team still leans on them for every decision.

They’re doing what’s always worked, and that’s exactly the problem.

The Fixer Instinct

The urge to fix things is one of the hardest habits to unlearn.

Most managers built their careers by being reliable problem-solvers.
When they spot an issue, they move fast.
When someone’s struggling, they jump in.
That’s how they earned trust, by delivering results, protecting the team, and keeping standards high.

But leadership changes the equation.
At some point, fixing stops helping.

Every time you step in, you remove an opportunity for someone else to think, decide, or learn.
You also teach your team, subtly but powerfully, that their judgment matters less than yours.

That’s when dependency takes root.

And it’s sneaky. It doesn’t look like failure. It looks like control.
The team still meets deadlines. Clients stay happy. You’re praised for “saving the day.”

But underneath, you’re building a system where nothing moves unless you touch it.

The irony?
The more successful you are at fixing, the less capable your team becomes at solving.
That’s the hidden cost.

Fix problems faster today, face bigger ones tomorrow.

How to Break the Fixer Habit

Breaking this cycle doesn’t mean becoming hands-off or indifferent.
It means redefining what “help” looks like.

1. Pause before rescuing.
When someone brings you a problem, your instinct is to diagnose and solve.
Try asking, “What have you tried so far?” or “What options do you see?”
You’re not withholding help, you’re building capability.
The first few times will feel slower. That’s okay. Speed isn’t the goal. Growth is.

2. Coach the thought process, not the outcome.
Instead of giving the answer, model how you’d think through it.
Let them see your reasoning, not just your result.
That transparency builds decision-making muscles across the team.
And once they learn how to think, they’ll surprise you with solutions you’d never find yourself.

3. Redefine what “good leadership” means.
Early leaders measure success by their personal impact, how many fires they put out.
Mature leaders measure success by what happens when they’re not there.
When your team can operate, decide, and adapt without you, that’s real progress.

Leadership isn’t about doing more.
It’s about creating the conditions for others to do more.

When you stop being the bottleneck, the whole team moves faster.

This week, notice the moments when your instinct is to jump in.
When you hear yourself saying, “It’s faster if I just do it,” that’s your signal.

Ask yourself:
Is this about getting it done, or building someone who can?

Because leadership isn’t about being the hero who fixes everything.
It’s about building a team that doesn’t need one.

If that feels uncomfortable, you’re doing it right.
Growth often starts with letting go.

Cheers,

Jeff