If Your Team Resists Feedback, Read This

How to Build Trust Without Lowering the Bar

When I first became a manager, I thought I had to choose:
Be the kind of leader people liked and trusted…
or be the kind of leader who held the bar high.

Turns out, that’s a false choice.

The best leaders do both.
They build deep trust and keep the bar high.
In fact, trust is what allows them to raise it.

Here’s what I’ve learned since:
When your team knows you really care, they’ll let you challenge them.
They’ll invite feedback.
They’ll take ownership.
And before long, they’ll start raising the bar for themselves.

But that kind of culture doesn’t happen by accident.

Trust and accountability aren’t opposites—they fuel each other.

The most effective managers aren’t just “nice.”
They’re clear.
They’re consistent.
They care deeply.
And they speak the truth—even when it’s hard.

If you’re worried that holding someone accountable might break trust, the real issue might be this: you haven’t built the kind of trust that can hold that weight.

The 4 C’s Leadership Check

Here’s the litmus test I use before giving feedback, delegating work, running a 1:1, or addressing performance:

✅ Clarity – Have I made expectations clear? Does this person know what great looks like?
✅ Consistency – Am I walking the talk and reinforcing expectations through my own actions?
✅ Care – Does this person truly feel I have their best interests at heart?
✅ Candor – Am I being honest and direct enough to be useful?

When all four are in place, even hard conversations become alignment moments—not conflict.

Your Turn
What’s missing most on your team right now?

  • Clarity

  • Consistency

  • Care

  • Candor

Hit reply and tell me.
I read every response.

Best,
Jeff